When all is said and done, our league looks a pretty much like this:

Comment: First of all, congratulations to strong finishers Flamengo for winning the group and breaking the 100 point limit in the sky – it’s a decent qual group to win, this! Graeme Allan and his 11 joins Rafael Lameirao in next season’s Premiership, while AC Meda and Iversen Town will be our representatives in the Championship.

Next season we will have all of 9 divisions in SEFA, but the qual 8 teams will be sent to a mere 8 (San Ivansburgo seems to have left us) as far as I can understand. Norwich Farmers will, in other words, be plaved in the 8th division in stead of 9th.

Read on for the stat kings of this season!

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Note: In some areas the fair thing to do would be doing the maths on who performs best in the minutes given to him. This will take too much of my time, I’m afraid, so the following will pretty much be based on stat rankings. Where the count of goals/assists/etc is dead alike, but one has had less games the one with less games will be ranked higher than the other.
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Top Scorers

1. Yoan Gouffran (Iversen Town) 27 in 40, Stephane Baudouin (Ever Winners FC) and Ezequiel Lavezzi (Flamengo) 27 in 48
2. Nikola Kalinic (Allan’s 11, sold to Hampton Youth FC after the season) 26 in 39
3. Johnny McDonagh (Flamengo) 22 in 38

A free scoring trio, all with 27 in the bag. Gouffran made his 27 in 40 games, making him most efficient. Baudouin and Lavezzi were not in the top when we were halfway, but in the end bot managed to pass Kalinic and Haynes, Lavezzi showing that he was an important part of Flamengo’s great finishing run.

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Most assists

1. Stewart Downing (Flamengo) 27 in 47
2. Sulley Muntari (Iversen Town) 23 in 47
3. Gaël Kakuta (Ever Winners) 17 in 47

Downing has passed Muntari in the last half of the season, much showing why Flamengo took home the top spot. Kakuta made a strong finish to get in this top 3 and has been an importan player for Ever Winners FC.

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Best Average Rating (half a season’s worth of games (24) or more)

1. Yann Mandanda (Ever Winners FC) 7.44 in 45 appearances
2. Stewart Downing (Flamengo) 7.35 in 47 appearances
3. Sulley Muntari (Iversen Town) 7.34 in 47 appearances

Mandanda actually raised the bar in the last half, upping his average with a decent 0.3 points. Downing made it into the top 3, being an extremely important performer with his group winning side, while Muntari followed the rest of his team going down a few notches.
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Clean Sheets (half a season’s worth of games (24) or more)

1. Marcelo Barovero (Flamengo): 22 in 48
2. Sergio Romero (Iversen Town): 21 in 47
3. Jean-Marc Humbert (AC Meda) and Matteo Andreoletti (Ever Winners FC): 21 in 48

What a finish from Flamengo! A whole team performing top notch gives Barovero a steady flow of clean sheets to make top goalie this season. Romero beating Humbert and Andreoletti on the average clean sheets per games rule, seeing as all three gets the same amount of clean sheets.
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Best 11 so far (based on average rating, 24 games minimum):

GK: Roberto Santamaria (GDGafanha)

DL: Ricardo Villarraga (Allan’s 11)
DC: Tomas Costa (Iversen Town)
DC: André (Ever Winners FC (sold to The FA after the season))
DR: Felipe Mattioni (AC Meda)

ML: Yann Mandanda (Ever Winners FC)
MC: Sulley Muntari (Iversen Town)
MC: Vitor Junior (Flamengo)
MR: Stewart Downing (Flamengo)

FC: Leonardo Pischulichi (Amsterdam Admirals (sold to A-team after the season))
FC: Alejandro Aguilar (AC Meda/A-Team)

Still making the list based on pure average ratings (I don’t like it, but I haven’t got time for anything else), but upping the required game count to 24 (and the games has of course have to be played in our group, effectively excluding names like Stephen Kelly on the right back). It’s not a shabby team!

That’s it for the Hoff report. May the Hoff be with you.

Welcome all Super Evening Qualifying League 8 managers to the season 8 first half (well, sort of – last game is next week-end) report.

Last seasons champions: Seeing as this is a qual league, there were none.

Right now, our league looks a little something like this:

SEFA q8 (top 5)

1. Allan’s 11: 17 wins, 8 draws, 2 losses and 59 points
2. Iversen Town: 18 wins, 4 draws,  7 losses, and 58 points
3. AC Meda: 16 wins, 5 draws, 4 losses and 53 points
4. Flamengo: 15 wins, 5 draws, 7 losses and 50 points
5. A-team: 11 wins, 10 draws, 4 losses and 43 points

Comment: The top is still to be decided in this qual, remember that only the top two finishers will get to play in the premiership next season. Right now the projected points suggest that Allan’s 11 and AC Meda (although half a team has been sold, what could the plan be?) will be our premiership representatives. Good luck to all of us in the last week of competition!

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Top Scorers
Yoan Gouffran (Iversen Town) 20 in 28
Nikola Kalinic (Allan’s 11) 19 in 27
Danny Haynes (Allan’s 11) 15 in 27

Not much to comment here, these are the three players who have scored most. Note that Allan’s 11 is well represented with 2 goalgetters – as we all know two are better than one.

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Most assists
Sulley Muntari (Iversen Town) 13 in 28
Stewart Downing (Flamengo) 12 in 27
Kevin Thomson (Allan’s 11) 10 in 25

If I were to do an average assist pr game here, it would be too close to differ. Stewart Downing is obviously an important player for Flamengo.

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Best Average Rating (3 games or more)
Mesut Özil (AC Meda/Hells Bels United) 7.45 in 18 appearances
Yann Mandanda (Ever Winners FC) 7.42 in 23 appearances
Sulley Muntari (Iversen Town) 7.35 in 28 appearances

Usually 2 games will do, but seeing as we are halfway through the season I upped it to 3. Özils beautiful average was obtained during his AC Meda days.
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Clean Sheet Average
Chris Seitz: 11 in 26
Jean-Marc Humbert (AC Meda): 12 in 25
Sergio Romero: 12 in 28

The sharp observer will see that the ranking of these goalies is different in FML’s own statistics central. Actually, I’ve turned that table right around. 11 clean sheets in 26 games is a better performance record than 12 in 28. It’s not the way to do it when counting goals in the top scorer list, but it’s the way I think best in ranking goalkeepers. Feel free to discuss this in the comment section.
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Best 11 so far (based on average rating, 10 games minimum):

GK: Stuart Taylor (A-Team, now released, 7.10)

DL: Ricardo Villarraga (Allan’s 11, 7.25)
DC: Ricardo Martinez (Bayern Munich, successful loan to TW13Gooners, 7.14)
DC: André (Ever Winners FC, 7.13)
DR: Tomás Costa (Iversen Town, 7.12)

ML: Mesut Özil (AC Meda/Hells Bells United , 7.45)
MC: Sulley Muntari (Iversen Town, 7.35)
MC: Miralem Sulejmani (AC Meda/ROMAR , 7.34)
MR: Yann Mandanda (Ever Winners FC, 7.42)

FC: Leonardo Pischulichi (A-Team, 7.33)
FC: Alejandro Aguilar (AC Meda, 7.28)

Yeah, basing this on rankings is the easy way out. Sorry about that, mates. I could have made some sort of algorithm for any given position, but I opted not to take the time.

That’s it for the Hoff report – be in touch if you miss something or have some insight to offer.

Last seasons champions N/A 

     League table at time of press. 

 SEFA  QUALIFYING LEAGUE 3 (Top 5)    

Team                                                  W       D       L        PTS

    CF Belenenses                            8        3       0        27
    Dublin Hearts                             8        1       3        25
     LAZIO FC                                    7        3       2        24
   Scotland United                         6        5       3        23
      U.D.S.C.A                                   7        1       2        22

Comment: A strong start to the season from Nuno Simoes’s CF Belenenses, due in no small part to Valeri Bojinov’s return of 13 goals in 11 league games (what I’d give for a striker with that kind of scoring ratio!).  Dublin Hearts, expected to be among the frontrunners, and U.D.S.C.A are hot on their heels, and it should be a good s**** for the top positions – I hope to keep you all posted as the season goes on…

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GOALSCORER_4> Top Scorer                      
         
 Valeri BOJINOV (CF Belenenses) 11 Games, 13 Goals
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  Top Assists                   

 Stephane SESSEGNON (CF Belenenses) 11 Games, 6 Assists

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 Best Rating

 Valeri BOJINOV (CF Belenenses) 11 Games, Average Rating 7.69

He’s sweeping the board a bit this week, but will he still be on top next week?

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 Clean Sheet                    Apps         CS

 Sebastian EWEKA (Dublin Hearts) 12 Games, 7 Clean Sheets

 This guy should work in a launderette!

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 Goal Of The Week

    I’m afraid to say that this goal was scored against me – take a look, it’s a cracker!

         <Doornbos Goal:match clip#72193089>

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 Team of the Week 
GK     Sebastian EWEKA (Dublin Hearts)

DL     ADRIANO (U.D.S.C.A.)       
DC    Gustavo FUENTES (Daggers United)          
DC    Miodrag NIKOLIC (Dublin Hearts)          
DR    ROBER (U.D.S.C.A.)       

ML    Fabrice GIBON (U.D.S.C.A.)              
MC    ALONSO (Antingham Allstars)               
MC    Aden LJAJIC (Maidstone Minions)
MR    Bruno PEREIRINHA (The Legend Killers)

FC     Laurent N’DIAYE (U.D.S.C.A.)
FC     Valeri BOJINOV (CF Belenenses)

Manager – Nuno SIMOES (CF Belenenses)
 
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The first week has been dominated by the mighty sides, but I can some surprises forthcoming as the season continues.  I’ll keep sending updates as the season unfolds…..
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Incidentally, I’m obviously upset that none of my players have made it into the team of the week, so this space in the mails will be my chance to show off what my squad can do.  Having studied the stats for hours, I am proud to say that Martin HARNIK, my AMR, has the most dribbles per match out of the entire league!  A huge 90 dribbles in 11 games, which is over 8 per game – wonderful stats but I do wish he would cross more often!  Let’s see if anyone can beat that statistic…..
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If you have anything you want me to include in the update mails, please let me know.  Any feedback is welcome, I can take it if you’re not happy as I’m a big boy now.  I hope you enjoy having the basics in a snapshot

Thanks to all those who nominated a player for the Team!

FORMATION 433           MANAGER: GARY SHEPPARD P 13 WON 10 Draws 2 Lost 1

GK: Matteo Andreoletti Ever Winner FC

DL:  Leighton Baines- Team Fetsund Horses 

DC: Paul Thompson- Iversen Town

DR: Rubén Calderón-  Munich Hotspurs

DC: Curtis Davies- Ally`s All Stars
 

MC/Borys Baranets- Jinky`s Boys

DMC Pelé -  Bury Town FC

MC/AMC: McDonald Mariga- Iversen Town

ST:Matheus de Carvalho – Daggers Utd

ST:Kenwyne Jones -AFC Clepburgia

 ST Ched Evans – Sutton Badgers

XFA Premiership:

First stop, the premier division. After just a week its already become apparent that local moderator and sharp dresser Richard Gibson’s transfer spree in the last wage auctions have proved very effective in his bid to finish higher than the miserable 13^th he managed last season. So after signing no less than 9,382 new players his team, “Southsea FC” currently sit on top of the league with an impressive 19wins from 37games, although I fully expect him to be knocked off my another mod (you guys beginning to see a pattern?) in Marcus Cain when Benzema hopes to score another million goals to fire him to league glory after narrowly missing out last term. Newly promoted “U.S Aubenas” have started on great form with no less than 9 wins from their first 14 premiership games, so its looking good for them this year! As usual “Asgeir FC” and “Fiddle M F” are looking like they will mount a challenge aswell. At the wrong end of the table “Itz’s Army” already look like prime relegation candidates, they have a poor return of just 2 points from 10 games, can they turn it around and stay up, only time well tell!

XFA Championship:

Down to the championship and we see that it could well end up being very tight indeed at the top of the table. Currently Gary Harrison’s “Banjo Badgers” sit aloft at the top of the table, but with teams such as cheshunt fc, St. Pauli FC and last years Premiership drop-outs Royal Fannyfarts hot on his heels it wont be an easy task. As far as relegation goes its already looking like Faley Athletic and Melmac United could struggle this season, although it is still very early in the campaign. And I’m sorry to say that I have to end this part on a low, you see lobby favourite and workout king Chris Atkinson has left us, just a week after splashing out 50k wages on an 18 year old striker and turing his team into contenders he vanished, not even a word to anyone. So if you are reading this Chris, come back babes, we still love you <3.

XFA Division1A/B/C:

Now down to the pits of despair that are the feeder divisions, only the hardest warriors can come through these AI infested leagues without some kind of mental scarring or sleep problems. But it already seems that “EBEEROI F.C.” will be overwhelming favourites to land the Div1A title and win promotion to the championship. As for the Div1B the newly transferred “Spartak Marlow”, managed by everyone’s favourite moderator Glen “probably loves cardigans too much” Fyrth, are en route to challenging for the league title and automatic promotion, all they have to do is keep up with current leaders “Fly Emirates”.

XFA Cup:

Obviously after 1 week most people have only played one match so there isn’t much to say here, except that Richard Gibson’s Southsea FC have stormed through their first few matches and are waiting to see who they will play in the last 16. Two other teams have also made it this far, “Valleone United” and Premier league new boys “Brave Sir Robbo and His Minstrels”, both will be hoping they get favourable draws when it comes to that time.

XFA League Cup:

The league cup is a new competition for this season, and it seems to have gone down a treat with most! Most of the new teams went through the group stages and onto the knockout section. The most impressive teams so far have to be Marcus Cains “AFC Caining” who took a brilliant 46 points from 18 games to finished the group stage as the team in the best form. Elsewhere in group G “Retrovirus FC” (yes, that is me)won the group and got through all 18 games only conceding 6 goals, GW 0 – 1 Samir Handanovic I believe. Its sure to be a hotly contested competition and one that I personally am looking forward to participating in further, if I don’t get knocked out by AI like in every other cup….

That’s it from me I’m afraid, no doubt you enjoyed this so much that the thought of it coming to an end is filling you with crippling sadness, I can only profusely apologise for that, its not my fault, sometimes I just forget my own awesomeness.

Brad.

The Buckfast Bandits currently lead the Premership by a point over B.H.A & Deal Dynamos in joint 2nd. Although they have played a few more games, almost double infact! 3 Teams prop up the table having yet to play a game, although Tom’s Dublin Hearts have been sunning themselves at a belated training session in La Manga! I only hope he didn’t bring Craig Bellamy with them!

A quick peek into Division 1 shows Dickie FC sitting top of the pile, 7 points ahead of  Hapoel Madrid in second, with a game in hand! Meanwhile on down the League Sean FC have adapted well from Division 2 last year and appear to be mounting a serious promotion challenge! Although  the division has yet to take off!

Meanwhile in Division 2 the Buchanen Bhoys are pushing Kikka United hard for the Champions spot with the Destructive Diva’s sitting in 4th place having played as many games! With quite a few games still on the cards, Division 2 looks like it will he a tight run affair!

In Division 3 Pamfila FC & ArsenHull take up the top 2 spots  with a wide open league and plenty of game to go yet this is going to be a fun time! The new entries into the FA seem to have settled in with varying degrees of success, some playing well and some yet to play!

With the Dublin Hearts away in LaManga (see above if ya forgot) Daggers United pushed forward their advantage and have consolidated their place in the top spot in the Under 21 league!

The Under 19s is wide open at the minute with 5-9 games played a piece they make for a very competitive league this year which is as wide open as the Atlantic itself!

While in the Under 17s Hapoel Madrid have set the pace with Elmsdale Druids in quick pursuit

With the cups yet to really take off yet the game is set & everything is yet to play for within the entire AEFA!

More to follow!

*Figures accurate at time of going to press!

eXtreme Football Association

XFA: As it was last season the XFA premiership looks as if its going to go right down to the wire. Having picked up the title last year Asgeir FC will be looking to retain their title, but having not strengthened the team very much will he achieve this? Teams likely to challenge them include, AFC Caining (a mod team, so basically he cheats), Neuilly Sse, Shado, Retrovirus FC (me) and newly promoted U.S Aubenas who’s youths look set to come good this campaign. As for the championship it again looks very competitive with last seasons premiership drop-outs, Royal Fannyfarts looking to be top dogs. But lobby annoyance Chris Atkinson’s “Atkinsoninho UTD” have spent big in the off-season and look set to mount a challenge for a promotion spot!

Weekend Casual Association

Sullcrew have taken the WCA Premiership crown for the last two seasons but with the promotion of Team Red Devils to the Premiership after their demolition of the Championship and League 1A the title race is now wide open.  Team Red Devils hold all of the senior and most of the youth cups from last season and look to be the dominant force for season 5.  Will their youth side turn out to be as good as their seniors?

Nighttime Football Association

The NFA is an odd one, since the GWs incarnation its been dominated by our resident nocturnal Watford fan, Jim “I love lamination” Hamilton. He and Adebayor’s sordid love affair leads to the annihilation of all comers, more often than not he ends the league campaign unbeaten, so he’s the only realistic choice! As for the championship Pretentious FC, having just transferred to the NFA may mount a challenge for promotion, as long as Stephen McManus keeps banging in the corners anyway!

Early Evening Football Association

The EEFA is widely recognised as one of the most competitive and active FA’s in Blissett, aswell as having the best orgs (Paul & Michelle). Olimpia Gdz, Cesena United and Symbios Juniors have all been stalwarts of the top10 ranks nearly since the GW began, all 3 are fighting it out in the uber competitive Premiership for top spot, it remains to be seen however, if Olimpia Gdz can be moved as champions. Some may look at Mr. Aguero as a dark horse for the title though. And I think the GW is united in the hope that Molloy gets relegated! As far as the championship goes Leeds United look to be real contenders this season for the top spot, lets hope Sam can pull it off!